Icons of "Home"

idyl·lic
Pronunciation: \ī-ˈdi-lik, chiefly British i-\
Function: adjective
Date: 1856
1 : pleasing or picturesque in natural simplicity
2 : of, relating to, or being an idyll


When making checklists for all of the things we want to do to our (soon-to-be) new house, I realized how many things have been ingrained in my mind over the years as to what the idyllic home (to me) would have. Not necessarily stylish things, but more romantic ideals or icons of the perfect home. Some of them are things I will probably never realistically have, but they've been with me for years & I thought I'd share some of them with you. I'll start outside & work my way inside............


I've always wante a white house (image from Martha Stewart.com)



A front porch with a porch swing is the perfect spot!!



A wisteria-covered pergola (although I just learned that wisteria seeds are poisonous so we won't be getting any!!) (image from here)

Image below (and top image of post) from House Beautiful. How amazing is this?!!!
Window Boxes: They makes houses look so cheerful & loved. (image from hooksandlattice.com)



A garden large enough to "walk through" and "sit in" as opposed to edging the yard or house (image from indigolandscapes.com) I like a little mystery in the garden & it would be such a luxury to have enough space to do this:



A beautiful back patio (image from one of my favorite Cottage Living houses)



There are a lot of plants I've always thought embodied the perfect yard or garden. Here's a list of some of them: A magnolia tree would be amazing (image from here) and I could just sit there & smell the blooms for hours!! :)



A lilac bush to cut blooms from and again, smell for hours (image from gardencorner.net )



Forsythia bushes (image here from Dumbarton Oaks)



TONS of hydrangea bushes (image from http://www.youcanlearnseries.com/)



Peonies -- how beautiful are they in arrangements?!! (Image from marthastewart.com)



And finally, it used to be rose bushes until I put them in my townhouse garden & managed to kill almost all of them, (image from http://www.sloatgardens.com/) but if I could do better, I'd still want them... (Actually the bushes themselves were in such bad shape that I felt absolutely no guilt for cutting off every single bloom & taking them inside for arrangements!!)



A tree swing for the little guy & me too!! :) (image from http://www.ntoddblog.org/



French Doors (Image from that same amazing Cottage Living house) leading to some beauitufl outdoor space... They'd be amazing in the bedroom...



A big hood over the range (image below from House Beautiful) A hood makes a kitchen look like such a functional yet homey space:

A window seat (image from Cottage Living)... We built one in our old house & it really was the perfect spot for chatting on the phone, cuddling with the dog, getting warmed up by the sun, reading & relaxing

A banquette or window seat for an eat-in kitchen (image from Country Living)

A grandfather clock (image from mantecalighting.com)... When I was a little girl I loved the mystery surrounding them. They made me think of huge houses you could get lost in & have adventures in & always wanted one when I grew up... Think The Borrowers... But sadly, now I really don't even like to know what time it is & would have to go with a Mora clock if I did have a huge clock in my house.

A fireplace with two chairs that can face each other with an ottoman in between for reading with my husband... The two chair & ottoman thing would also be amazing in the bedroom...

A guest bedroom (image from Country Living) is truly a luxury to me. To have it ready & waiting for friends & family to come at any time... to not have to unfold a bed/ mattress & not have to hide anything away... Just an easiness...

A sunroom/ conservatory that could act as a family room or dining/ breakfast room (image from here)

A huge living room/ great room where lots of people can be at one time doing different things (images from Cottage Living & House Beautiful)

A round table for intimate dining (Pic from House Beautiful)

And finally, a four-poster bed (Bed below from Restoration Hardware) ... We had a sort of British Caribbean mahogany styled one in our old house and it's in storage now. Because the lines of the new house are so modern, I can't really picture it in our bedroom but the lowerl level feels a bit more traditional, so we'll be putting it in the lower level guest bedroom. (I think it'll be fun for guests too :) The bed below is from Country Living's 2008 Idea House:

I think we all envision a home and a life in which we have the time and space to be with our families & friends. Some call it the "good life." It's a home with simple luxuries... where things are made easy so we can spend our time doing what we really want to do. It's a life & home with the perfect balance of function & beauty. These are just some of the iconic things that come to mind for me when thinking of the ideal home... how about you?

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Design Persuasion

Design Decisions. We all have to make them. And except for the lucky few of us, most of us have to make these decisions with some type of approval, agreement or acceptance from a spouse, partner, boyfriend or girlfriend or roommate. (For the rest of this post, I'll simply say "partner")

It's often difficult to convince your partner of your vision & to come to his or her "senses" and agree with you. ;) (I have to say right off that I am one of the lucky- my husband may not always agree with me, but he does completely trust me now & even if he doesn't "get it" at first, he lets me go ahead--- to date the only thing I think he's hated is that white feather wreath.) Needless to say, many of my clients are couples, and many of my friends & family require "2" yes's before moving along with a project so I do have a lot of experience in dealing with partners who disagree design-wise.

Just now when I was giving my toddler breakfast, I thought of what my husband had told me last night. (Our toddler has gotten into the stage of shaking his head 'no' (actually he shakes his head and says "uh-uh" in this strage squeaky little voice that's very unlike his normal deep, scratch voice- it's pretty funny but anyway-- when we offer him a choice of food.) My husband reminded me that offering Christian 2 options instead of just picking food up and asking him if he wants it works perfectly.

(I remember the same worked really well for my litte sister when picking out outfits to wear-- "This one or this one?" not "What do you want to wear?") Anyway, I'm sure most of you parents out there do this, but I was just thinking today how much it also applies to design decisions.

There are certain clients who want options to decide from, while there are others who want to know what I think is the best option & present only that option to them. Some clients LOVE to see options & others are overwhelmed by them. Some clients want to be very involved & others want you to make most decisions with approval from them. When presenting design decisions to your partner, I think it's often the same thing. You have to figure out how your partner is most receptive. If you bring something home & have it all set up, will he or she freak? not notice? love it because now they can see what you're talking about??

I think it's important for partners to make decisions well together. To be efficient. To make design decisions based on the issue at hand and not because he or she wants to win or have a compromise or whatever... Most of the time there's one partner that is the design-lover (I know there are those cases when BOTH are & there are usually AMAZING results) and it's probably the partner reading this blog right now. She or he is constantly brainstorming, looking for ideas, creating design solutions & presenting them to his or her partner. Now, the partner, can be receptive, hesitant, unwilling to spend the money, gung-ho, completely against CHANGE (a biggie) and a lot of other things when presented with a new design idea.

Now you can't change your partner's personality, but you can change how you present your design ideas to him or her. Think of the way you can present your idea that will most likely get you a positive response. Figure out what type of decision-maker your partner is & present your ideas accordingly.

I have seen cases when presenting two options & showing both sides of the options & letting the partner (or client) come to his or her own decision (which is usually yours) works. I've seen cases when both partners need to be equally involved & if one partner is not there at the spawning of the idea, he or she later is against the idea because of his/her lack of involvement. (I think in these cases it's really important if you notice something like this going on to just bring it up & say what you're noticing so your partner can realize that he/she needs to focus on the issue at hand and not on his/her negativity towards the idea.) Some partners need third party opinions. (There have been cases where I'm called in simply because couples cannot agree between themselves.) There are (lots!!) of cases where one partner hates change. And then theare are other parties that do better when the plan is simply told to them & they don't have to be bothered with the decisions/ details.

The important thing here is to figure out what type of design decision-maker your partner is & how you can present design options so that they'll be accepted. Here are some decider- types I came up with:

1. Does your partner need to be presented with options & be an active decision-maker? [If so, rresent 2 options you like.] or2. Do options scare him? [ Show him or her your plan.] 3. Does he or she need to think they came up with the idea on their own?? (Oh good luck here and please watch "My Big Fat Greek Wedding'--- "The man is the head of the family and the woman is the neck who can move the head any way she wants it.")

4. Is money the determining factor? [Present your idea and explain how you've made it with finances in mind: "I LOVED this one but I found this very similar one for $60 less. What do you think?"]

5. Does your partner simply want to disagree with your ideas? [ Again, all kidding aside here, there are bigger issues going on here & I really think being up front about your partner's disagreeableness is important for your relationship. If you feel that this is going on, the best thing is to be open about it & try to get to the root of the issue here so you can be happier... but sometimes it can be as little as someone having a bad day(really, don't present design decisions when someone's not into it or has had a tough day.)]

6. Does your partner hate change? [ This is another tough one. People get into routines & get used to things and a lot of them don't like change. I think sometimes the best thing here is make it clear to your partner how important it is to you and how much you need this change.]

7. Does your partner just believe something or have an opinion about something that is kind of illogical? [This is a tricky one... sometimes people form opinions/ beliefs about things they don't really know much about based upon one situation or hearsay. "So and so hated having marble countertops... I'll never get them." or "I don't like all-white bedding." or "I hate flowered material." Sometimes people haven't seen all of the options or heard all sides of the argument. I think when you are presenting here it's best to start out with, "Now I know that Johnny didn't like his marble countertops, but read this article on the pros and cons & see if you think they might work out for us." or "I know you're against all-white bedding, but it's going to be easier to clean because we can just bleach it. We can also add in some color with pillows and blankets so it won't feel sterile."

or "I know you don't usually like floral fabrics, but check out this fabric. It's not the traditional floral you would think of & it's not feminine at all. "]

8. Does your partner just think you don't "need" something? [ First make sure that you really do "need" it before proceeding & then explain why you think you need it & why it'll improve things & what it'll do for the space.]

The important thing is to be really respectful of your partner & to make sure that you & your partner don't take opposing sides. Sometimes when someone gets it in his/her head that they've made their decision & it's final, there's no winning. Or at least not happily. He or she might always look at that lamp & be reminded of the battle & hate it. I'll never forget that I asked my friend to take a look at a lamp I was returning. I had purchased it for a client who didn't want it & I called her over & she loved it. She brought it home & when her hubby came home (who is VERY involved in design-decisions.) didn't like it. I felt terrible & was like "I'll take it back." and she was like "no," hahaha and so I left & told them they could decide & let me know. A week or two later, I was over & it was still in the living room with the tags on it and I asked her what the deal was and she said they were still arguing. Eventually she won but I still sort of feel bad and kind of laugh when I see it. (And they are a really happy, healthy couple, it was just the way the design-presenting went down. "Look what I did honey," is never really going to fly with them.)

So anyway, figure out how you and your partner work together. What's the best way to present a design idea for him/her to be most receptive? What type of decider is your partner?

xoxo,

lauren

[I also have to say I'm sorry about all the bad-grammar: "them" and "they" when referring to 1 person but him/ her got really wordy!!!] *images from real simple & fabric & furniture from calico corners

ps- STILL waiting to hear back (3 days! arg!!) about our offer!!!

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Living in the Present Moment

I don't know about anyone else, but this has felt like the shortest Winter ever to me. I think it probably had to do with Thanksgiving being so late & then the Christmas Season just flew by & it's already February!! (I was still listening to Christmas music in January because I didn't get enough! Anyway, I used to get a little blue come February & just need the Spring so badly- I would start thinking of flowers & gardenening & being outside & just crave warm weather. (Not depressed or anything but just almost bored & restless... probably a touch of seasonal affect disorder??)


(image from http://www.housetohome.co.uk/)

Anyway, it's been different for the past couple of years: In 2006, I was pregnant & just so excited & happy preparing for the baby.


In 2007, I was so busy with a 6 month old & I joined this great mom's workout class, that I didn't even have a chance to notice the weather. Below, my poor little guy with doilies taped to his back:


And now this year, with a 1 and a half year old & a business & a blog, I've been so busy this has felt like the shortest Winter ever. The busier & more into what's going on in life I am, the less I notice the weather! (Below, a room I did with my mother-in-law)

Yesterday, it was in the 70s & whenever these warm days come around in February I sort of have to steel myself up & not let Spring in. Yes, of course I go out & enjoy the weather, but I try not to get used to it, to expect it... just so I can get through the winter. BUT, I think I sort of let Spring in yesterday. :( (I bought a quilt at an antiques fair that will be perfect for Spring, I had the urge to pull out the Spring clothes, we washed & cleaned out our cars, did a little yard work, and I planned lots of little Spring cleaning/ organization projects in my mind and desparately had the urge to move out & buy a house NOW.) Long story short: I'm totally craving Spring now.

(image from mytorontohomeimprovement.com)

My husband & I have been trying really hard not to "click" our life away (yes like the Adam Sandler movie) and to enjoy every moment. We've resolved to have the best time we can, living in my parents' basement & to not always be thinking about the future, but I totally started wishing the time away this weekend. I'm sure it was the house-hunting combined with the beautiful weather but anyway, I realized I really need to just stop. To focus on the now. And it starts with little things: having fun on a daily basis, doing little creative projects, eating good food, getting excited about the small stuff, enjoying the weather, etc.

(image from http://crumblycookie.files.wordpress.com/)

We usually do get another cold front in late Feb/ March, so I know I need to get a little more excited about Winter. And I would LOVE more snow days! So, I need some more ideas for winter fun. Easy little projects that make life prettier & more organized. Fun activities that keep you in the present moment. I'll be compiling a post with these little winter projects & pick-me-ups & would love your input. (Below, our dog Ashby buried in snow)

I want to share with you my favorite quotes. The first is from a Christopher Pike book (I will never stop loving him!): "Be in the present moment. If you live life one day at a time, then tomorrow will take care of itself & the past will not torment you. "

And the second is from this little plaque I've had since I was a baby that I keep in my top drawer: "There's something to be loved in every day."

So, I'm going to put my energy in the now, in the present moment, and to love something about every day. And right now, that present is February. So again, I'll be doing a post on winter pick-me-ups & projects/ things to help you embrace Winter and need your help!! What gets you loving Winter?

xoxo,

lauren

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